when the leaves turn brown, i'll be around

How's this for a change of pace, I'm feeling ... not great, but better. I've found someone who I write notes to telling them about why I'm acting the way I am, and just finally letting somebody actually know, and knowing that they know, makes this feel a whole lot lighter. It's strange trying to remember how my laugh sounded, and I thought about that in chemistry class, when I actually laughed and it sounded so weird. So unfamiliar. I'm still having trouble falling asleep, but I'm starting to rely more on my friends. Does that sound strange? I have to justify this with the fact that I don't like giving any part of myself away (with one exception), but maybe I should. Breaking down barriers seems easier than trying to build them.