it's just like you to hurt me when i'm feeling good

I've got a whole palette, but I only want to paint with one colour. Honestly. Seven days left, I mark each day with another scar on my bone. I've ripped up all of my floorboards trying to get my hands on anything that reminds me of you. Everything reminds me of you, and my house is clean. My hands have touched everything. My hands need to be on you.

I thought of stuff I should have written down last night, but it was too hot and I was too tired, and yet again I've forgotten it all. I remember it sounded pretty good at the time.

listening to: november steppes - kris ellestad

all that i could think was "please don't blow this"

So I haven't really talked much at all about Sled Island, so here it is in a nutshell! All in all, it was amazing, and I think there's still some stuff going on tomorrow, but I'll be working unfortunately so today will be the end of this super festival for me. Anyways;

Tuesday
Poster show at Circa Showroom: so I got Megan to come with me to this, because really, who wants to go to a show alone? We got there a bit late because the bus took forever to come, and we had no idea where the Circa gallery was since it was discreetly in the back. The posters there were lovely, but I didn't bring any cash with me, so unfortunately we didn't buy any of them. Megan wanted to go home early because they had just gotten home from backpacking that day, but after we sat down to listen to Honeybear, we just got swept away. His voice is so dreamy. It's just so laid back and it swoops up and down so effortlessly. Knots played, and he had a really great voice too, but I only actually liked one of his songs. After him was Indiensoci, or Raphaelle. Personally, I like her a lot more in The Neighbourhood Council, but even she admitted that her set wasn't up to her standards. I really liked her looping, it was reminiscent of Final Fantasy. It was just very busy music, that's all. Throughout the sets, more and more people eventually came to look at the posters and have a beer, so it got really loud. Thankfully, when it was Kris Ellestad's turn to play, he asked us all to go listen to him outside. I must say, each time I listen to Kris Ellestad, I love his music more and more. The way he sings is so captivating.

Wednesday
Kris Ellestad, Woodpigeon, and Grizzly Bear at Central United Church: I had been looking forward to this show for a while. I ran into Rebecca while waiting in line, so I sat with her, and eventually Heather and Michael met up with us. The acoustics in the church and the sound was perfect, and so when Kris Ellestad started, his voice cut into the air and it was like a massage for my brain. He ended his set with another rendition of The Secret, with all of the members of Woodpigeon adding their instumental touches and blowing my mind. After that set, Woodpigeon played. I just have to say, I love Woodpigeon. I've listened to their songs from Songbook and Sketchbook over and over again. I believe they played all new songs, and it was really, really good. Their harmonies, and piano, and violin, and just everything mixed together created such a perfect sound. Grizzly Bear ended the night, and holy crap. I was kind of into Grizzly Bear, but I hadn't really listened to them that much. I am a sucker for harmonies, and that's what Grizzly Bear is all about. I especially loved Marla, it was just so perfect in that setting. Church concerts are just so great.

Thursday
Portico, Young and Sexy, Octoberman, and Chad VanGaalen at the Telus World of Science: This show I went to alone because I couldn't find anyone to go with me. And I was late, because I hung out with Gavin beforehand. I got in right as Portico finished their set. Apparently Octoberman got lost, so Young and Sexy played in their place. They were good, with girl-boy harmonies and stuff, but it sounded a bit ordinary. Octoberman played after them, and they were quite good. A bit tired, but still. Chad the man played last. I only knew three or four of the songs he played, and only one was off of an album (Mini TVs). It was still so good, though. A couple times he messed up, and would stop to apologize, or explain why, and it just made him so much more endearing. His animations playing behind him were so cool too. I love his stories and his voice. I think the best song that night was either Willow Tree or Molten Light, both of them in which Matt Flagel plays the accordion. They were so eerily beautiful.

Friday
Mainstage at Mewata Field: So I volunteered this day, so couldn't really listen to the music. I paid attention to it during The Wet Secrets, though. They sounded pretty sweet from where I was. After I got really hungry, I took a forty minute break and watched Broken West and Portastatic. I didn't really listen very carefully, though. After my shift ended, my sister and I watched Yo La Tengo for fifteen minutes before booking it to the Martha Cohen theatre. Mike, Kirstin and I left that show to go back to the main stage. We caught the last couple songs by Tegan and Sara. One of them was Living Room, which is the one song by them I'm like HOLY CRAP YES! And I did feel like that, it was impressive. But the main reason we booked it (or at least, my main reason) was to catch Broken Social Scene. Holy crap I love those guys. And when I say guys, I mean that no female vocalists were at the show. Even though that would have made it so much more amazing, they were still really great. They played some Broken Social Scene songs (KC Accidental, Fire Eye'd Boy, Cause = Time, Ibi Dreams of Pavement), some Kevin Drew songs (Farewell To The Pressure Kids, F--ked Up Kid, Frightening Lives), and one Brendan Canning song (Churches Under The Stairs). Ibi was so great, it was loud and just .. wow. I love them.
The Neighbourhood Council, BBQ, Azeda Booth, and Deerhunter at the Martha Cohen Theatre: The Neighbourhood Council was one of the bands I really wanted to see. Their live show is always so amazing, and I listen to their tracks nonstop. So when they played in the Theatre, it was perfect because it just held their sound so well. They are such a cohesive group, they are always together. It's amazing to watch Austin and Taylor both play the drums, because they hit exactly at the right time, their rim shots and crashes synchronized. Marlin was so good to listen to because it's just such an awesome song. One of their newer songs they played I love too. At the end everyone requested one last song ("play that first one off your album!"), and after some persuasion, they picked up their instruments and nailed it. They hit everything so well, and we all gave them a standing ovation because they deserved it. I didn't stick around for BBQ or Azeda Booth, but I came back to listen to some of Deerhunter. Their lead singer is hilarious; the bassist is too. The ending of their last song (Strange Lights) was the longest and most epic ending I've ever heard. It went on for probably twenty minutes, it was noisy and loud and just crazy. The bassist apparently didn't have to play anything, so he threw down his guitar and fooled around on the stage, then left, then came back and just hung around. I think it could have ended a lot earlier, but it was just really funny to watch. I'm going to have to check out more of their music.

Saturday
Mainstage at Mewata Field: I had to work today, so I didn't manage to get to the stage until quarter past seven. Luckily, of Montreal was still playing, so I got to listen to about half of their set. That half was spectacular, it was quite the show, with guys dancing around in animal masks, and fake wrestling matches, and shooting confetti around. of Montreal sounded top notch too. I love their harmonies. Their last song was Heimdalsgate Like a Promethean Curse, which I was so glad I didn't miss because it's my favourite song by them. It was so good, so fun to dance to. I wasn't too impressed by Wire, or Mogwai, but The Dodos were SO. GREAT. They are two guys, one who plays guitar, and does lead vocals (and plays a bit of trombone), and one who drums. There was also another guy who popped up in the middle to play the toy piano and the garbage can. Their music is so exciting! And I love the looping. I'm jealous of my sister, who gets to see them again at the Legion .. probably right now!

But anyways, yeah! That was Sled Island for me, and if you didn't go to anything, then I just have to ask .. WHY??? I can't wait for it to happen next year already!

listening to: pacific theme - broken social scene

i got shot right in the eye

1. Times I have seen members of The Neighbourhood Council: seven; times I have talked to a member of The Neighbourhood Council: one! I somehow ended up sitting next to Katie at the Chad VanGaalen show, and we chatted it up a bit. She is cool.
2. After Chad VanGaalen finished playing, as I was leaving the Discovery Dome, he waved and said hi to me. I waved back.
3. Going down the stairs in the Science Center, I walked beside the front singer of Young and Sexy, and told him I liked his set. He said thanks.
4. Walking across the street to my dad's car, the drummer from Young and Sexy waves to me.
5. After Tegan and Sara finish playing the mainstage, Mike, Kirstin, and I go to the backstage area and wait a bit because Tegan and Sara are seriously three feet in front of us. After waiting for a little while, Tegan/Sara comes up to us and says hi, and apologizes because she is going to go greet her family members. I give her a high five, even though it's a bit feeble.
6. Before the Neighbourhood Council plays, my sister introduces me to Mark Hamilton.
   
7. After Broken Social Scene plays, I go with my younger sister to look at the merchandise, only to find out that she has no money. I have no idea where Mike or Kirstin went, so after meeting up with my dad, I run backstage to see if they are there. Instead, I see Andrew Whiteman. I tell him I loved his show, and that I jumped from another show just to see it. He asks for my name, and he introduces himself, even though I know who he is. He shakes my hand.
8. I keep running further to see if Mike or Kirstin are there, but they are not. As I'm coming back, I see Kevin Drew and so I wait for him to finish talking to somebody else. I tell him I loved their show (yeah I know, I'm so original), and he thanks me. He goes to shake my hand, but I ask for a high five instead. We kind of miss on the first try, so we do it a second time. It's solid.
9. As I'm continuing on my way back to my dad, I see Brendan Canning and I stop to say hi. He compliments my shirt (I was wearing my Islands one), and I tell him that I would've bought one of theirs, but I had no money. He says, "awe, well give me a hug, honey" and so I do. It was a nice hug. I say goodbye and I run off.
   

i can't find the cello or yet the french horn

1. While at the Sled Island poster show, a guy kicks my shoe and asks for a high five. It turns out he mistook me for my sister. It turns out he was Jordan from Azeda Booth.
2. Kris Ellestad asks me if Megan and I will go outside to listen to him perform. Unfortunately, I was on the phone and could not really listen to him.
3. After the Grizzly Bear show last night, while talking to my sister, Chad VanGaalen comes strolling along with his bike and starts talking to my sister's friends. As much as I wanted to say something to him, and although my sister was going to find a way to cut into the conversation, she got distracted and started talking to Taylor from The Neighbourhood Council. I still cannot talk to anyone from The Neighbourhood Council out of fear that I will sound like a dork (times I have seen members of The Neighbourhood Council: five).
   

everyone knows where the wind blows through your hair

It's been a while since I've actually written something substantial, where I did not just talk about my day or something so mundane like that. I've been having a massive writer's block, and it has been annoying me to no end. I really want to write a song; I want to get forward and be able to have lyrics to a song, but I can't. Everything I try to form sounds so stupid. Last night I went to the poster show, and listened to four different amazing musicians. I can't ever understand how people write songs, but there they were, and they sang and played so effortlessly. One of them had just written a song two hours before.

But anyways. I'm going to try to just say whatever I want. Lately I haven't really been observing things in life, I've just been going blindly, feeling things and not quite knowing why they are that way. I think I've been spending too much time with people, and not enough with myself. When I was lonely I could write a lot better, let me just say that. But maybe I don't mind; it's kind of a one or the other thing, and right now I would choose people. Certain people, though. Some people I cannot stand, like the group of teenagers on the c-train or bus that decides to be obnoxious simply because there are a lot of them there, or people who decide to walk very slowly in front of you. There are interesting people, though; last night while walking back to the c-train station, Megan and I walked behind three guys who walked the entire way linking arms. The guy in the middle simply held his own hands behind his back. We walked fast the entire time we were behind them so we could try to understand why they were doing that, but we only realized other things but the point we wanted to get. But anyways. I don't know. Sometimes when I go golfing alone, I just start thinking of people. People I miss, people I wish I said certain things to. I have definitely changed this year, and the one thing I hate about it is that I cannot create anything what so ever. Have I become more shallow?! Do I just not care? It all worries me. I used to be afraid of change; now I don't really know what to think.

There's still a lot of things that bother me about myself right now. Like the fact that I stick my nose up to other people's music; and I feel really bad about that. Like, it's their choice, and just because they don't like my music doesn't make them any less. Yet, why do I still do it? I feel bad for Kaitlyn, who I always make fun of for her music. I'm a jerk sometimes. I should probably work on thinking before I speak. Although sometimes that's such a problem for me; that I do think before I speak, and I think about it for hours and hours, analyzing the situations that could arise from a simple phrase. I remember before when I would imagine something I'd say, and the scenario that would go from it, but when I did say it, it would not go the way I wanted and I end up looking like a fool. Now I don't do that so much. Now, I don't really say what I want to say at all.

listening to: careless - honeybear

but love is all i have to give

Dear Allison,

I'm nervous to write this note to you because I know I can't express all you mean to me in words. You are the one person that I want to impress, with how I act and everything I do. You are the one person that makes me worry about how I look and dress. But most importantly you are the one person that all that doesn't matter to. You see right through all that stuff into the real me. And the crazy thing is that you still love me.

It blows my mind to think that I only met this year. You are such a huge part of my life it is impossible to imagine it without you.

You are such an amazing person. With you I can talk about anything, we can talk nonsense for hours and it'll be awesome. And then we can just sit without saying anything, just enjoying each other's company, and it'll still be awesome.

With you I've shared so many perfect moments. So many times I've been able to realize a moment and wish for nothing more from it. And now no moment can be complete without you in my arms.

I love you.

Dear Gavin,

This year has probably been the best year of my life. I made so many new friends, joined so many new things, and just enjoyed things so much more. And I got to meet you, which has got to be the best choice I've ever made. I remember back when we were at choir camp, and I first met you. When we were at the dance party, right then I realized how much I liked you, and I had to fight an urge to not grab your hand while we were standing in that circle. We were so close then. We are so close now.

These past three weeks have been absolutely amazing. I know I've only ever dated one guy before, but right now the only person I ever want to be with is you. Whether it's while we're hanging out with all of our friends, in your car, at a park, or with your family, there is no better feeling I get than when I am near you. I just feel so comfortable with you, like it's absolutely right, like we are supposed to be together. And when I'm away from you, I get such a intense nervous feeling that doesn't go away.

You are the nicest guy I've ever met, and there is nobody I know who would drive up to my house just to pick me up and go back to your house, or drive me to my orthodontist appointment and wait for me there so we can hang out after. I love it when we just go to a park and sit there, even when we just lay there in silence. I love lying on your chest and listening to your heart beat. I love when you put your hands on my sides, or when you put your hand on my leg, because I get such spasms from being ticklish that it's the funniest sensation in the world.

I love you. It took so long for us to figure it out, but I'm so glad that we did in the end. It just feels so natural when we're on my driveway, and we just stand there together until I really have to go. Your arms are the safest place to be in. I have never felt so cheesy with my emotions, but with you I don't care. You are the only person I could quote Backstreet Boys lyrics to and mean them. Thank you so much for the note, it meant more to me than you will ever know. You mean more to me than you'll ever know.

listening to: [untitled bonus track] - fm static

i've always been in love with you

The past two days have been absolutely great. On Thursday, I studied like no other for the entire morning. I don't get it; chemistry was the one subject I did not care about the most, and yet I studied the hardest for it. Anyways, after I finished studying, Gavin picked me up and we went to his house to hang out for a little bit. We worked on a song and then we jumped on his trampoline, which was really, really dirty. And made my hair really staticky. Especially whenever we started fighting, and he would drag me across it. After his parents came home, we went out for a picnic with a great selection of food: two canned drinks, one cheese bun, one stick of pepperoni, two plums, two cookies, and an almost-empty bag of Ritz crackers. But, I only ate hate of the cheese bun and got full, so it was okay. We went to a park in Silver Springs, and decided to go down a path he had never taken, to find ourselves by the river. We crossed over it and headed to the very top of another hill, where everyone could see us. When we were kissing. It was a bit embarrassing, especially when a guy came by with his dogs and he actually said hi. Like wow. After that we walked back to his car, but not without having another grass fight. He drove me home and we talked on MSN while I pretended to study.

Yesterday, the chemistry test wasn't that hard. It all went by and is now a blur. I'm done school! Kim, Cydney, Bonnie, Anna, Aidan, Katie, and I all went to Earls for lunch. Aidan left after that and we trooped over to Dairy Queen. Then Bonnie had a great idea to go to Cameo and Cufflinks, to look at the dresses. And then the people there told us that we could try some on. So, we scrambled to find dresses (it was hard for me because everything was too big!) and they looked fabulous. And after we tried on nice dresses, we tried on really ridiculous ones. Gowns you could only find in princess movies. It was hilarious. The worst part, however, was that Cydney and I had left our cameras out in Kim and Katie's cars, so we had to settle with taking pictures on Cydney's phone. I really wish I had brought my camera though! After that, we went to the dollar store and tried on hats and things and it was really funny until one of the employees told us we couldn't do it anymore. After that, Kim drove me home because I had left my phone at home, and Gavin and I were going to go somewhere after. Three minutes after I got home, Gavin gave me a call, and he picked me up 17 minutes later.

We went to Market Mall to get my brother a present, and then we went to his house so I could help him draw some stuff he needed for his missions trip. My first drawing came out really good, and then they got progressively worse from there. I had dinner with his family, and then after we all watched Pan's Labyrinth (again, but I really liked it). It was a really good night. Gavin drove me home after, and we stayed on my driveway for another ten minutes before finally saying goodbye.

And this weekend is looking like it's going to be an action packed one!

i keep drowning in your love

I am almost completely done school, yet why do I feel so stressed out? This weekend is turning out to be so difficult. I hate calling work to tell them I can't show up, because I haven't worked for the past two weeks. I guess my reasons are all valid, but it all seems so weird. I can't work because I'm volunteering. I can't work because I'm entering a skills competition. And on top of that, my brother's birthday party is on Saturday, and I really want to see The Neighbourhood Council that day, so I have to coordinate what time I'm going to go to Olympic Plaza for that. Everyone wants to hang out this weekend, but it's impossible. There's no room.

But anyways, I'm pretty happy. Screw bio, it felt like it wasn't that hard but you never know. Everything in life has clicked into place, I feel right and happy and summer is hurtling closer at a insanely fast speed.

it took so long to figure out

He said it. I said it. Those three words, they floated in the air like clouds, mixing into each other and wisping away. I meant them with every fibre of my body.

(It was strangely close to this.)

bring it back to the basics

Between yesterday and today, I think I got laryngitis. My throat hurts and feels like it's on fire. If I finish a sentence, by the end of it I start gagging. I have to swallow even though it hurts all the time, and cough. I only managed to get about an hour of sleep. But other than that, I feel fine.

Last night was amazing. We didn't watch the sunset, but I lay on his stomach and watched Pan's Labyrinth, and then we went down to his basement and laid in each other's arms, and in my opinion there really isn't much better than that.

listening to: white socks in birkenstocks - language arts

right from the start i was stabbed in the heart

I have a nervous feeling in my stomach! My math exam is coming up really soon. So the past two days have been somewhat busy. On Wednesday it was the last day of school, so pretty much no work was done whatsoever, except in math. In English we watched a movie, and Tamara drove me crazy with her "Oh look Allison! That's you!" insults that were very feeble. All because I told her that the ugly monkey in the opening scene looked like her.

In chemistry, we were supposed to work on review but automatically everyone ignored it and six people came over to Kim's desk to play Boggle with us. I won, with a whole bunch of points! Ian struggled. Our teacher gave us snacks, only to tell us that we weren't allowed to eat them during the class. Like what the heck. She also made us do an evaluation of her teaching. I doubt anybody was honest.

At lunch we met up with Cailey, Mikki, Megan, Tess, and Adrian as they tried to look for crickets. We found one, and then headed back to Diana's table to eat. Kate got really mad at us being a couple and so crushed our hands with her yearbook while I was trying to get my pen back. It hurt. There were cookie battles, and lots of crumbs everywhere.

In bio, we played more Boggle! It was a lot of fun. Tim is really good at it! Bonnie decided to play with umbrellas in the room, which made Sid very superstitious. Kaitlyn, Justine, Alyssa #1 and #2, and Catrin headed out to buy coffee for all of us. Gavin came in the room after to hang out because he had a spare. After class, we talked to Jessica for a bit, and then met up with Cailey, Megan, and Mikki again. Out of the blue, we made plans to hang out that evening, and I felt bad because Gavin waited to take the train with me and I ended up going straight to Cailey's house.

Cailey and I had a lot of fun! We first played Boggle. Then, we went out puddle jumping, which led us to a baseball diamond, where we made rivers across the entire diamond. Later, we went to the park and played tetherball, even though the pole was surrounded by a massive puddle. I got schooled. Later, we went to the playground and spun around in the eggs, I almost ran into the fence. We swung on the swings, played on the four person teeter totter, and then headed back to her house to make dinner. On the way back, we found a weird tree and I climbed up it, and when we got back to her house we had to walk her dog. We got a lot of talking done, it was really great! When we were in the middle of making dinner, Megan and Mikki showed up and we played more Boggle. Then we went out to go puddle jumping, except we ended up in the field by her house, and a massive puddle was in the middle. Cailey and Mikki started innocently splashing each other, when suddenly it led to a whole out brawl, and Megan joined in. I documented. It was really fun to watch, they got totally soaked and after making the tennis court all wet, and after Cailey almost ate the pavement, we went back to Cailey's house so they could take off all of their wet things. After they were changed, we went to go get a movie. We got Dan in Real Life. We tried to set it up on the Windows computer, but it didn't work and we kept calling Robin to help us, only to switch to the Mac after. When Megan and Mikki had to leave, it started pouring outside. Cailey and I were watching the movie in the dark when there was a huge flash of lightning and then a massive clap of thunder. It was crazy. It was a really good night.

Yesterday I studied math until I got bored, so for about two and a half hours. Gavin picked me up for dinner, and we went to have Korean BBQ, although neither of us knew how to really eat it, what with all the toppings and rice they gave us. I made myself look like a fool, because I couldn't use my chopsticks to eat around the bones. After we finished, we went to a park and walked completely around it by the river. It was really, really, really nice. I had an amazing time.

Two hours until my exam, I'm freaking out a bit now.

i wanna live it out

"Hi Allison,

Thank you for submission into the Sled Island Create-a-Poster contest. I am pleased to make you aware that you have won a weekend pass to Sled Island!"

it's another prank call in the middle of the night

I had a dream last night, and so many of the details were blurred but what I remember is that you and I were laying on the ground, and I went to give you a hug and you turned your head and kissed me all over my face, and all I could do was smile and give you a kiss back. And then Jessica, who I assume was hanging out with us at the time, exclaimed, "you must love him a lot!" And I remember that in my mind, I was thinking, "yeah, I do," but I was afraid to say it aloud so I simply laid there and felt your embrace. I just had to put this down, it's just something I want to remember.

listening to: house by the sea - iron & wine

i'm terrified of losing you

My math test was alright. Playing Boggle in biology was really fun. I'm jealous of Chelsea's camera, it is actually so beautiful. Gavin and I walked to the bank and there were M&M cookies. Ms. Manoj didn't show up for the first ten minutes of class so we all left. Aidan, Kim, and I went to the library. We played Boggle with Anna, Cassandra, Cydney, Katie, and Kaitlyn. Bronwyn and I went to go pick up the cake during band, and it was more amazing than I expected. We took so many pictures, and the cake tasted great, and it was fun hanging out. I took the train home with Gavin, and when we had to say goodbye we had the longest hug.

I never want to let you go.

listening to: heart it races - architecture in helsinki

the humans are dead

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you shoul'dve told him earlier!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♥=P"

I don't have anything to post that hasn't been posted before. But, I love my friends!

i went to ninja school to learn how to murder you

I'm exhausted and my head hurts, but right now I have time to blog so I guess that's what I'm going to do. Somebody checked this in France! When I clicked on the URL, it was all translated in French and that was kind of exciting. But anyways.

Technically it is Sunday, but I'm going to pretend that it is actually Saturday. So yesterday (Friday) after school I went to the band party, which really wasn't that exciting because not many people came, and well there wasn't much to do. I got to hang out with Brittany though! That was really funny, we stood by the fire and had conversations that would have to stop because we were laughing too hard. People kept walking by at the wrong moments, like when we were talking about being pregnant to food or whatnot. We took jumping pictures off of a picnic table, and Brittany kept freaking out about how high it was, which made me laugh even more. After a while, Gavin showed up (Brittany: "ooooh, your lover is here! I'm sorry I said that!") and most of the people there decided to play baseball. We went over to talk to Mikki and Megan, and then Gavin got picked on a team and I walked away. Baseball really isn't that fun when you play with a bunch of band people, you know with the non-hitting and stuff. Kate, Brittany and I spent the time talking, and then we decided to go to a playground only to find that some kids were already there. So we headed back to our playground, and played on the teeter totter and went on the swings. Gavin came back from playing baseball, and we tried to climb a tree. Well, we did climb the tree actually. My clothes got really dirty. We hung out with Kate and Brittany some more before finally heading off to go to the movies.

Prince Caspian was really good. Umm I love being with Gavin, I just have to say that. This paragraph is going to be really cheesy and boring. I love holding his hand, and leaning on his shoulder, even when it means that I have to watch the movie sideways. I love when he puts his hand on my leg, because that's where I'm actually really sensitive so my leg had mini spasms the entire time, and I loved that feeling. I don't know why. I love being able to feel his phone vibrate because my hand is on his leg. I love when we lean again each other's heads, and when he whispers funny comments about the movie in my ear.

After the movie ended we headed over to Megan's for movie night. When we got there, we found everyone sitting in the dark. Apparently they sat like that after the first movie ended to wait for us. We watched Indiana Jones. I got to stay until midnight, so I got to watch half of the movie. When we left, everyone all of a sudden had to leave. Gavin drove Adrian and I home. When we got to my house, we hugged in my driveway for a little while, and I gave him a kiss on the cheek and just really, it was a great night.

I woke up at 7:00 this morning, thinking it was a lot later than it actually was and freaking out. My dad and I left at 7:30 and drove all the way up to Golden. I slept a lot on the way, I kept waking up and then falling back to sleep. Today's round was really wonky; I scored 106 but I definitely could have done better, I was doing alright on the front nine and I just totally messed up on the back. There were only four girls, so I won low gross! I've never won low gross before. I used the gift certificate to buy my sister a coat. I also won the skills competition in the girl's division, so I won a sleeve of balls, and nobody got long drive or closest to the pin, so I won a hat by calling Heads. The wait between ending our game and the awards ceremony was a million years, and it was hard to decide which coat to get my sister, so we didn't leave Golden until after 8:00. We stopped at a McDonald's to get a bite to eat, and it seemed like 14-year old boys worked there. After we placed our order they forgot to actually do anything, so we had to wait fifteen minutes to get our food. The people who worked there seemed kind of obnoxious. We finally left Golden at 8:30, and after a while I kept drifting in and out of sleep. I managed to stay awake until 10:25, when I finally crashed and when I rested my eyes I just ended up sleeping. I woke up right when we got into Calgary, and I had to call my younger sister in order to pick her up. We finally got home at midnight.

Well, I'm kind of tired, and I have another tournament to play tomorrow. I'm going to see Islands tomorrow!

i'm a love letter away

This has been such a slow week. I hate tests. I hate chemistry. Band was alright because we spent most of the time writing in each other's yearbooks while listening to other people do their playing tests. But other than school, I'm happy with life and a whole lot of other things.

and if the soul's hungry, feed it feed it feed it feed it

Elliot is the best when it comes to reactions. At first when we ran into him in the stairwell, all he could do was make hand gestures and make high pitched noises. Then, when we saw him in the gym, he asked if it was actually something, and when we said yes, he yelled "yeeeeeAHH!!!" in a really high voice and gave Gavin a really powerful high five. I love Elliot. He wrote some really nice things in my "yearbook".

Right now I should be:
Studying bio.
Studying chem.
Sending my poster to Mikki to print.

Pittsburgh is behind 3-1.

listening to: liver and tan - the neighbourhood council

the best you ever had was just a memory

Exclamation marks! I'm blogging a lot these days. Gavin and I drove to Safeway during lunch because I was originally going to buy a cake for band, but that's not going to be until next Tuesday. So instead, he bought a pizza bun and croissants for both of us. As we were walking back to the school, we came to the topic of us being official, which we aren't because we haven't gone on an actual date. So, he asked me what a proper date was, and suddenly he swung our arms and exclaimed, "hey Allison! Do you want to go on a date with me on Friday?" We're going to see Prince Caspian on Friday.

Anyways. It turns out that yearbooks are out! I didn't order one, so I'm just going to make my OWN yearbook. I'm going to have to make a cover and everything. Then people won't forget to write me notes again!

During chemistry I went through Kim's yearbook, and when we actually had to do work I totally blanked out. We got it done in time to play three round of Boggle, though. I figured out why I did so badly on the quiz .. M = molarity, not moles! In band, we really didn't do anything. I told everybody about cake money. It turns out that there are not 45 people in my band class, so I will be paying for some of it myself. Oh well.

After school, Gavin drove me to my orthodontist appointment, and it took them 12 minutes to change the wire and then we headed to Kensington to get Megan's present. After we got the order done, we decided to walk around while we waited. Right when we were talking about avoiding Megan, we looked up at the window of Higher Ground and saw her waving at us. Which was ridiculously weird. We were going to go get crepes, but we didn't exactly know where it was so we ended up having to cross the street and walk back, and at that time we saw Abbey and Megan, and we must've looked like dorks because we were just on the other side of the road, walking the opposite direction. And the crepes place was closed. We headed to Riley Park and just sat on the bench and talked for a while before finally having to walk back to The Rocket to pick up the shirt. I warmed up his hands. He cooled down mine.

listening to: colorado - grizzly bear

i can say the right things

I'm sorry for being so overly cheesy, but today I just felt SO incredibly happy! I just wanted to shout out and laugh, but of course I didn't. Honestly, I've never felt like this EVER! I am excited about all of this. It's weird to tell people, though. I mean, I always want to tell people, because I am just so happy that it's worked out like this, but it's just .. I don't know. I don't want to just blurt it out to everyone, I don't really understand the reasons why. However, it was really funny when I told Mikki, because Cailey came at that time, and when I finally said it, Cailey shrieked out and gave me a hug, and she was just so incredibly happy which made me smile.

But anyways. I feel like making a list.

1. There is a girl I met a couple months ago, a friend of mine introduced me to her when we bumped into her on the train. Ever since then, I see her everywhere, all the time! In the halls, in the cafeteria, at graduating ceremonies, it's nuts. Today I saw her when I walked over to the university to see if I could get some poster paper (I couldn't). We both walked into Mac Hall. And then I saw her again when I was walking out! Holy man. It's weird how it happens like this.

2. I have this really weird habit whenever I'm not thinking of any specific where I start counting from a random number. (28, 29, 30) .. and I'll count until I suddenly realize what I'm doing, and I forget what number I was at. Who does that? Or why do I do that? I used to do it when I was younger, when I'd count street lights starting at whatever number I wanted. Now I do it mostly when I'm listening to music, I'll count the beats from a number like 1022, or when I'm walking and I count my steps. Sometimes it really bothers me; I hate counting.

3. We're going to have a party in band tomorrow! I'm buying cake. I have to remember to buy cake. Mr. Paddock doesn't know we're having a party tomorrow.

4. WE NEED TO HANG OUT! Like, all three of us. asap. I miss you guys and we haven't done anything in a while! There are just so many things to say that can't be expressed on a computer screen.

5. I like starting or ending things on 5s and 10s. It's weird for me when it's in between.

listening to: sing me spanish techno - the new pornographers

we're divided by the ocean

"There are so many times when you need to make a quick escape, but humans don't have their own wings, or not yet, anyway, so what about a birdseed shirt?"

We are the birdseed shirt.